darling has left us five days liao. so fast . still unbearable lor. hais . sianz nth to do . still cant accept and believe . i still treating her alive as usual. left lots of words unsaid . i still missings you darling~ how have you been ? must tc of urself alrights . loves~ i will blog again soon.

went to send darling last journey no much ppl there . darling it's really unbearable. i love you i need you. why you never come to my dream i was waiting for you. darling really sorry 2nd day i never attend cause janelle nobody to tc . so sorry. hope you understand . to you saw us yesterday ? ur bf jeremy was there too. he injured himself too. darling if time really could hold back i wish i can hug you tight and you hold my hand how we did in the past. i miss those actions from you. i do cherish every seconds with you. i really do. i till now still cannot accept that you have left me and xiaowei. i really cant . i really love you. i miss you too. saw you pushing to that cruel fire i feel like hold you back tightly . i really dun wan to see that . i keep controlling my tears but it's hard . darling i love you . darling do you know that we have know each other for around 3 yrs plus ? i beg you dont know sotong . all these while we all have memories and those memories i will really cherish it . and when janelle grow up i will bring her to pray you and tell her that she have a beautiful god mother like you i beg she must be very happy . darling you must remember us alright? no matter what i still treating you as you are alive to me i really cant accept . darling darling darling ................................................. you heared me ? remember how we first meet? me vincent perry and you went to simlim you remember? hahas.. silly girl darling i love you. i love you so deep . if times can rewind back i will be happy . darling you're my precious cb i ever had . remember how you scold me 'CB" hahahas. so cute isnt it . darling i so miss the day with you. darling i thinking what are you doing now eaten ? you must takecare of urself lei . still worried for you .. darling me and xiaowei promise if we free we will go up to ur hs and see ur parents dun worry kays. i promise i wont let my tears dropped again i want you to be happy i dont like to see you sad. i promise . darling i wait for you tonight. muacks~~~ beloved darlings.

darling ~ the moment i think of you i really feel sad. hais. i cant control my tears i know you wont want to see i sad. but i cant . i love you i need you darling cannot accept you left us like this . really cant . the moment i thought of how they just throown you there and left by themselve i just cant take it feel like going to beat them up but i know if how they get beaten up wont get back you. i just hate ur bf jeremy so much. he dun care his pillion is his own gf hais. sianz i really dunno what to say . i'm sad ur last journey is tomorrow but i will try my best to go down. darling i going to buy fake eyelashes, glue, hellokitty pajamus, hellokitty stuff and ablum of all of us . i will try my best to get everything you likes. darling i really love you regretted treat you unwell but i know you wont mind i feel bad seriously. darling i love you. muacks~

darling~~~ do you hear me calling you? i miss you i need you do you hear me ? i miss the past times with you . i miss those words you told me. i miss ur cute bunny mouth . i miss every stuff with you. i did dreamed you last nites. i know you in pain . darling sorry never let you say finish then i woke up cause janelle wan milk. darling come into my dreams today . darling went to your funeral yesterday i nearrly cry out loud i really couldnt accept it do you understands ? i cant accept it when everybody telling me that . why you just dont listen to us ? why so sturbbon ? darling you keep say i cry you will heart pain why you still make me crying for you ? you say wont make me worry for you why you still do this . my heart really aching darling my whole mind is you now . keep thinking how we have our past how we knows each other that makes me cry . darling i really cant lose you . now then i know you my precious darling among all . darling do you heared me ? darling how ? i really dunno what to do . you say you want be janelle god mother but you haven done ur job yet . alot of things i waiting to see in you. i want to see you pregnant , wear wedding gown everything . why you bear to leave us ? i really cannot accpt you understand anot? darling ............................................................ i really need you. veerything is so sudden couldnt accept it . darling i catch the curlpit dun worry let us settle everything for you. those who left you there and ran off will get their retribution soon . darling i'm sad . i know you will tell me dont sad but cant hard for me . darling seriously i love you deep yesz i do . dARLING ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ come my dreams tonite tell me actually what happened only you knows veeyrthing . they are pushing all the blames . i wait for you tonite . darling.. the moment see you lying in coffin i really couldnt accept la~ i CANT I CANT I CANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

just came back not long went to my darling huihui funeral at bukit panjang gansar rd . her mum was so upset when i asked abt huihui stuff . the moment step in the funeral was like everything is still so fake for us . is like a evil dream . walk round her with sisi we wanted to cry but controlled. darling i know you wont wants us to be sad but cant . i regret never treat you good. i wanted to scold you fcuking bad . but cant . saw chris ur ex bf . he is so upset. and did you saw perry mums and perry dad ? everybody is so sad for you . hais. how i wish everything is a dream to us . most sad i think is xiaowei she dun even can see you . cause of pregnancy . darling you free must dropped by our dream kays . anyway dont regret so much le. everything had happen RIP bah. hope the person who cause you dead will be guilty after all. still dont get it . why you like to trust friends so much . in till end who the one suffer ? they can just leave you alone and just run off like this . darling we will miss you no matter what i will try time to go down visit you. RIP in peace alrights . see you in our dreams . muacks ~ forever darlings ~ ELIZABETH YAO SIHUI

darling huihui R.I.P from the call i receive from cat i really cant accept it really. and i called ur hs dunno is ur brother or younger brother why you just dun heared us why so cb why you like this . and to that freaking fcuk ass who hired you hope you wont hang over till todaY. you make us lost a sister fcuk you . darling no one wanted you to go . i know that your birthday is neared soon . on 16 nov you wanted to have a bbq at east coast . why you just leave like this ? WHY??? i told you so many times dont go rounding why cant you listened to me. and perry is coming out soon why cant you wait for him why ? i really cannot believe that you just so cruel and leave us . i really cant take it ok. darling passed few days we just had our conversation on fone and now you just leave me i really sibei sad you knw. i wanted to see ue in ur wedding grown with perry and you wanted to have perry child everything you haven settle . why you can just go like this ? WHYWHYWHY???? answer me can darling i wanted you to tell me what happen actually that day . come in my dreams pls . darling iloveyou . i hate you why you dun wan stay at home ? i taught you just had ur phone chat with xiaowei yesterday ? why ? everything is so sudden . darling i really cant believe it . darling ! you heard me calling you annnot? can you come back . come back pls darling . beloved ELIZABETH YAO SI HUI . DEPARTED ON THE 27 OCT 3AM . KINDLY WHO KNOWS HER PLS COME HER FUNERAL. AT BUKIT PANJANG AT HER HS

me and my laogong has settle down but for bheekim hai. and my laogong going to work soon . and me and janelle will sianz the whole day. maybe meet up with girl if he working or what. nows aday i give a little attitude really sorry hubby i keep thinking of money then you keep lend money from ur friends and i cant do anything i feel so useless hai. bibi laogong i hope you will love me and janelle and wont be like dennis . if really happened again i dunno what happens next . i really very afraid liao. but i trust you. hope you wont make me disappointed. (= iloveyou. hehe janelle going for injections later afternoon haha. dunno how her reactions . so anxious. so sad laogong cant pei us go .laogong i know that sometimes i tied to tight liao but i scared you make the same mistake hope you dont angry or what . but i try to give you more freedom i will try my very best .

it's been a while i blog. no time to blog. cause too much unhappiness happening this few months. it's really hai. girl i wanna tell you i really dunno how to console ppl but i only can help you is to support you when you are really down . anyway i have a god daughter name valerie haha. she's my first and only god daughter is so chubby la. hai but his daddy hais. dunno what to say .actually i also cant interfer that much cause also husband and wife problem really sad when see you so sad. hai. and i also cant do anything. girl you must be brave okays. everything will be over soon . although i keep say i hate dennis but i wont want to see my meimei and you got a broken family. but if there is a chance to get back you must try . okays. no choice if you dont wish also have to try . cause ur parents really wont want you to have a broken family too. dont get urself stress up. slowly sort out the problem. if really cant then go to the devil path . dont be rash. okays. hai really sad for you somemore cant do anything for you. and can say you are brave if is me i dunno what will i do .comform cry and cry but you neever. girl be brave i really worry for you. really dont want you to divorce with him if can patch back with him .still can feel that he still in love with you and meimei. if not he wont tell his dad so much then make until so much problem. yes he did say he want to divorce but he did'nt do that if he really dont love you all he wont wait till now haven divorce liao. you both cool down and think about it bahs. meimei still small think for meimei.

kinda sianz at home nth to do. bibi going to work soon i dunno what to do . cant use that much of computer . so sianz . my life getting boring each day. no choice hai. i love my laogong so super much kinda love till the max . muacks

bheekim really very good of her spend time with me i keep say my problems to her she wont feel like so fan but she still keep on listening to me. and when i really down she wanna came down find me then still drive us go home take things to moved to bedok . she really nice la. miss her so much. muacks~

i have been moved out from my hs to my hubby mum's hs . mondays really happened too much problems liao. after a fight. i really dunno what to do . just that my hearts is so fan. my dad also la. keep interfer our probs .i know he concern me but i just hate it that my dad beat him. sometimes i really hate my father . call us pay bill think liao also angry then chased him out i dunno la i dunno what to do both father and my husband . i only know that at the minute of time my husband packing his things going to leave i just wanted to leave with him dun wan him to abandon us . somehow still cant forget my father beat him . is like can sort out problems properly no need so hush and beat him up he also my husband mahs. aiya confuse la. see my husband like so kelian hais really he say the truth la he married me is really a wrong path. i cant give him the best and my father treated him like this . i really sad and feel sorry to him. i really love him that fcuking damn much . hais .

hai so much of problems la. i think until going crazy i wan die i wan end my life . i dun wan such life . PLSSSSSSSSSSS dun torture me liao. i really cant take it . my dad just told me that he cant tahan keep seeing him like everytime at home never wan call his mum liao. i know if my dad's really call. he cfm will blame me or what de. i really dunno what to do . nobody's know my feeling . i really down . going crazy liao fcuking hell . who can understand me ? i wan to end my life but i dun wan to abandon janelle and my family . i love him i want him. but i dun wan we two end up like this . i really want end my life cus i have brought my family upset abt my own matters. i really not a good daughter keep make them worrying for me . i know if i really end my life my family will be very sad. i dun wan them sad but i really dunno what to do . i really so crazy . hais . you all knows my feeling. when i feeling down i cant talk to anyone but i can blog . wanted to call bheekim but i scared i fan dao her. so i never. i'm stress . hais .

hais i have down my head again dunno what am i going on. i really wish i can just go like this and leave everything behind i really sick of tired of everything . i wan jumped down of my block but i'm just so scared . i dun have the guts to do jump. i wish i kannna a fatal accident and just passed away like this . well, i just love him too fcuking deep. i so wish i can just let go something. and i wont be so upset right now. the feeling is so damn sucks . what can i say is i love them i love eevryone tats cared for me. i want him to love and cared is it so hard for him to do in his own role to love his own family? i think alots and dosent slp well. think alot. i know i have depression but i just du console doctor. cus i think its no use for me to do that . i know my fcuking attitude causes everyone to hate me . i'm like this what can i do? its hard to change. just went to cook porrigde for my girl she is sleeping soundly right now. so cute of her. i going later in the late afternoon soon. maybe not i wont be coming back home soon. i have to start my new life and try to let go every single right now. i think i hav) i must sort it right fast or else i dunno what will happen next. i really dun dared to think abt it . cus it really damn scary. really happens too much of unhappiness things. i know i run out like this is a childish thing but i dun wan stay at home and anyhow think this and tht. i really going crazy . i just miss my 2nd aunty alot. i really do. is like past 3 months really happen too much i really cant accept it.maybe it's my life. i owe them too much in my past life so i have to return . thats what my girl bheekim told me maybe its true . i just dun wan to face and problems i wan my life with love care concern and joyful life i dun wan like this . i know my parents is worrying for me. its really a time to have a thinking to think of a way . if keep carry on like this i scared more problem is coming up. i love him i wan care for him but i just dunno what im thinking now. i need to cool down . it 9 am already . i can stay at home awhile more and i will leave my hs . sianz i have no much cash right now dunno how am i going to survive. i really hope gt miracle. i just fcuking sianz liao. i think i end here le.

heeeheee.. back to blog again chatting with LAOCB nows . just bath and everything went out whole day super duper tired. went out with bheekim and her girls (valerie) wow when i saw valerie my first action was hugging her carry her kiss her. she DAMn cute lor. dunno why guys like this can just dun care family and just leave them like this . can dun see baby we dun expect much as long as you love baby dun love us we are okays isnt it? older keep saying wife is yours how bad also is your wife cus you have choosen the path and you are in a role to takecare of them rite??continue my story =)then we went lots of places went to town, suntec, citylink,raffles and even went to raffles hotel there for LV shop.OMG i saw a LV purple wallet once i saw it i love it so much . and it cost 1K. that's ex. hahas. went coach too. cus bheekim want see her sling cost how much and we went in . i dun really like coach. i prefer gucci or LV . went shopping here and there. so much fun with her. and my girl was super naughty dun wan drink milk heng i cook porrigde and bring out if not i have to shop half way and turn home. thanks godness. after she had her porridge she actually want to sleep but see so much ppl surrounding her she just dun wan slp. and attitude all the way . and we decided to find a place to make them slp first. valerie was first to fall slp then follow by my daughter. then cat decided to come find me cus i told her i cant tahan to carry and take pram alone home. she is so kind that she at bugis fly down to suntec to find me . i love you girl. and awhile more at late around 7++pm went home. we took a cab home. and bath my girl . everyting. and i went down with cat to have dinner together. and help my dad to dabao. and just make her slp only . and came to blog. hahas. bought a same shoes as valerie & a FOX jacket for my girls . and spent nearly 100 from today. hahas. nbm as long as my girl happy i also happy. i think i end here le. lastly i give him till today come back home if not he can dun come bk forever. i dun need him . and whateever you told xiaoweiso what she can do what? is old two problems you need to call her and say? be a shame of you la PLSSSSSSSSSSSSS.........i'm tired dun wanna say abt you more . i shall end here . i will blog when i have time . =)

it's have been very long since i ever blog . sianz yesterday quarrel with him he was like so fcuk up man ! (bu ke yi ren liao) we was taking bus to whitesand therefore we alight the bus he was holding pram and 2 ezlink card and have to tapped them and we alighted the bus . he actually was asking dunno whether did he tapped the card? so i heard he was asking me why cannot tapped the card.and he say i provoke him WTH. keeep on scold me . in th end i just cant control and scolded him back and i want back my key and ezlink card of cus if i wan go i sure bring janelle with me . and i want to divorce with him and he agree nvm . Well, and i just walked off .and he also walked off . never come follow me or what . BLOODY HEll. he knows tat i dun have a HP and not even 1 cents with me . and he can just walked off like this. somemore i push my girl here and there thinking how am i going to take bus with pram and my girl on my hand . is ridiculous . and i pushed her all the way farfar to the bus stop. keeep thinking how somemore no money take cab . how ? and i went to whitesand and waiting for lift. and keep waiting so long never come down . hais and i walked the whole big cirlce. thinking how am i going to do ? so i went to take mrt instate. and went to aljunied . and wanting to go home but have to go to north east line so far . and already in mrt going aljunied my girl already keep shouting not happy liao. how to take mrt to go home like this . bo bian i alight at aljunied .and i planned to go grandma hs . only place i can go . i from aljunied mrt walked all the way to macpherson okays . think la if is you how will you feeel . is so fcuk up lor. and walked half way she cry and dun wan sit wan carry i no choice of cus carry her all the way lor. see one hand carry her .another pushed pram . you really A BASTURD . I JUST HATE YOU SO FCUKING MUCH . i have never stead with a guy like you before . seems you say you cant tahan my attitude den just say why must everytime wait till quaarel den say ? now wad wan flirt or wad? all this while keep flirting excuses yuo given me is my attitude who forces you to did this . now how going to flirt again isnt it ? GET A LIFE LA . everybody is saying you tat you having a childish mindset . cant you grow up . keep say i childish think before you ever say me ! i just hate the freaking side of you darn you!i tried so hard to forgive you but i just cant ! you understand ?